Woke up feeling like shit! We went to fireworks show & it did a number on me. Just made me sad. Brought some feeling about the wedding that never would be. You know its just 3 days away now. And like every freakin body is getting married that day. No way to avoid it. Thing is Im not sad over not getting married nor do I even miss Ryan. Im just sad over the whole thing. It's totally weird. Then had a run in with the one true love of my life. Did a complete different number on this girl. And I heard Ryan's voice for the first time in a month. It was pretty crazy. Didn't bother me though. So, that much is good.
Woke up with fever & feeling sick. Skipped the BBQ & Im home alone with nothing to do but think. I think that this girl has thought a little too much. You will read about what I wrote about Chris in the next blog. Did get to finish my book, cleaned off most of my desk & I do have a ton of movies I need to watch. Should catch up with those. I also wanted to make a new pen holder for my desk. I should look up some stuff to get some ideas.
God, where the hell is Jaxson when I need him? lol Off to spend the rest of the day doing whatever. Happy 'effin 4th of July!